Last week I began a series of posts about sacrifices that I am choosing to make and their worthiness. I had planned to make it a daily series of posts covering homeschool, being a stay at home mom, being a Chaplain’s wife, and also being a Child of God.
As the weekend and the beginning of this week passed, I have decided that it will instead be a weekly series posted on Thursdays. So, you can mark your calendars for the next few weeks!
When I first began thinking about sacrifice, it was the sacrifice of homeschooling. I was feeling the effects of some of my sacrifices. They were quite hard to ignore at the time.
In thinking about them, I came to the realization that every decision, especially big life decisions, require us to make some sort of sacrifice.
Even though I may not feel the effects of some of those sacrifices as much as others…they still require it.
That is the way I feel about being a stay at home mom….most of the time anyway.
I feel incredibly blessed to have this opportunity to stay at home and care for my children while my husband supports our family financially.
This is the way Keith and I always knew we wanted to structure our family. It is also the reason why we waited several years after getting married to begin having children.
We wanted to be prepared emotionally and financially for me to be able to stay at home with them.
In the early years of our marriage, I worked full time as a teacher while Keith served in various ministry positions. We prayed and sought God’s guidance in planning our family so that we would be able to survive on one income when that time came.
When Keith was accepted as an Active Duty Chaplain in the Army, we knew the time was right. A few months later, I became pregnant with twins!
I worked throughout my pregnancy until they were born and I haven’t looked back since.
This was a relatively easy decision for us to make. Being a homemaker and a stay at home mother is a calling that I am so blessed to be able to fulfill, but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t require sacrifice.
It requires a sacrifice of finances as we live on only one income. We live comfortably, but not extravagantly. We have learned to save for what we want and even to live without things that we do not need.
Being a stay at home mom requires a sacrifice of pride. I have had to let go of some pride as I trust and allow my husband to solely support our family. It is tempting to want to earn money “of my own†but then I realize that nothing I have is really “my ownâ€. We are a family and as such, we share and support one another.
I also prided myself on being good at my job. I was a good teacher and found pride in the praise I received in the classroom and among my peers. I often question myself as a mother. I don’t always feel confident that I am doing the “right thing†when the “right thing†is all that I want to do. Likewise, I don’t often hear praise at the end of the day for a job well done.
Being a stay at home mom requires a sacrifice of time. I am with my children pretty much all the time. I am responsible for them twenty-four hours out of the day. The weight of that responsibility and the time it takes away from “me†can be overwhelming at times. I have to be creative to find ways to make time for myself and to find quiet in my days at home.
Being a stay at home mom requires a sacrifice of self. Some days it feels like I just give, give, give without a lot of thanks or gratitude. I have to lay aside my wants and my desires to meet the needs and even the wants of my three children. I cannot do whatever I want to whenever I want to because there is a higher calling upon my days. This higher calling is to care for the needs, physically, emotionally, and spiritually of my children.
I have to love when I don’t feel like loving.
I have to give when I don’t feel like giving.
So, then, are the sacrifices of being a stay at home mother worthy?
Do the rewards outweigh the sacrifices?
Yes, absolutely they do!
Even though there may be struggles, doubts, and questions as I look at the sacrifices that are being made, I could never ever imagine doing anything other than what I am doing by staying at home with my children.
I am investing in them.
I am investing in their lives, in their future, and in their spirits.
I get so much joy from watching them grow, play, and learn.
As much as being a stay at home mom requires me to sacrifice of myself I feel quite selfish in my desires to be with my children.
My days are hardly ever dull as I cherish my moments with them…beginning with the moment they are born.
Being a stay at home mom means so much more to me than the few sacrifices that are being made. It is a calling I am happy to follow.
My words seem so inadequate to express the worthiness of this sacrifice.
What sacrifices are you making as a mother?
Do you stay at home with them or are you sacrificing by being a working mother? Yes, I realize you have sacrifices of your own.
Do you count your sacrifices as worthy?
Pat says
Your post actually had me thinking about all the sacrifices my own mother made for me and that I never really appreciated until I became a mother. As a typical teen, I resented her and her ever watchfulness over all of my activities. I resented not having store bought stuff because she made everything for me to wear. Now I look back and see all the love she put into those things. How much of her time and energy she sacrificed for me. I realized later in life how much she did without so that she could buy material to make me clothes that looked in style. It is a shame that we don’t realize this stuff sooner.
.-= Pat´s last blog ..Lifting Others =-.
Sherry says
Wow! What a blessing to read this morning! Thank you so much for posting this. It has encouraged me today!
Have a blessed day! â€
Sherry
.-= Sherry´s last blog ..The Bridegrooms book review =-.
LifeAtTheCircus says
This series is beautiful. What a great idea for a series. I meant to comment last week on home schooling. I too feel that sacrifice, especially in my inability to keep house the way I want or to participate in all the activities we used to do before homeschooling… but then I am so thankful for the opportunity. As for staying at home. Yes, I def think it is worthy of the sacrifice. Truth be told, I feel it is such a blessing and I am just so, so thankful that I am able to stay home with my kids full time.
.-= LifeAtTheCircus´s last blog ..Earth Day Give Away! =-.
Michelle says
There is so much meat here to chew on! I am a home school mom who has always been at home with our children. My husband stepped down from his other job in order to focus on ministry. I am prayerfully considering how to begin a part-time online business to ease some of the financial strain we will soon be experiencing.
I too have struggled with guilt about doing the right thing.
.-= Michelle´s last blog ..Hard Lessons From a Newbie Blogger# 2 Part One =-.
Muthering Heights says
Amen, amen, and AMEN!!!
.-= Muthering Heights´s last blog ..The Real Art of Conversation =-.
Maggie Mae says
Ohhh Monica, you hit the nail on the head! You touched so many of my fears and emotions about being a stay at home mom having left my highly successful and financially rewarding career a year after my beautiful Olivia was born 8 years ago. I consider homeschooling all of my children (with and without special needs) almost daily but hesitate perhaps b/c I was not an educator and so I feel inadequately prepared to do so compared to the “professionals”… though I also doubt their ability given the beaurocracy they face. I admire your courage and the sacrifices you make to continue.
.-= Maggie Mae´s last blog ..Down Syndrome Adoption — Life In A Good Home Or A Horrible Institution? =-.
Annie says
I find that the days I make the most sacrifices, by putting my children’s needs and desires before my own continually, and making their happiness and development a priority over me, I go to bed feeling the most content (as well as the most exhausted). The beautiful thing about the thanklessness of being a mother, is that it makes us see our need and cling to God. Pride and human thanks is not motivating us, but if we can hear the words of our heavenly father saying “well done” we find a far greater joy.
.-= Annie´s last blog ..Competition in Marriage =-.